


A reputation to maintain

by Werbena



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: April Fools' Day, F/M, Humor, Plans going south, Pranks and Practical Jokes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-31
Updated: 2015-03-31
Packaged: 2018-03-20 15:26:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3655371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Werbena/pseuds/Werbena
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki has serious plans for celebrating his favorite day in the year but the circumstances don't take his wishes into account.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A reputation to maintain

**Author's Note:**

> Characters mentioned below are definitely not mine. The plot, however, is my own idea. Story written for pure joy of writing. Not making money from it.
> 
> I wrote this fic about a year ago and kept it in a drawer. Last week I came across this idea of mine and after some modifications I decided to publish.
> 
> Happy April Fool's Day! :)

Being the God of Mischief, Loki took every coming opportunity to make other’s lives more… interesting.

Sometimes his pranks made them miserable, sometimes he had to deal with a very painful case of vendetta (yes, Barton, you weren’t fooled, that arrow straight in the buttock had stung like a bilgesnipe’s bite) but by trial and error he managed to adjust.

After a short period of close and impartial observation, Darcy decided to make things easier by introducing the idea of lists, which of course he didn’t write, being satisfied with just mental reminders.

And so there were more or less three categories of people to prank, supplying him with victims for every possible mood and degree of boredom.

His favorite was the one in the middle, with ‘Fun, Games and Not So Subtle Threats’ headline. It consisted of Stark, Rogers, Barton, Romanoff, Stark, his own not – really – but – still brother, Rogers, Hill, The Warriors Three, Stark, Rogers, Lady Sif and did he mention Stark and Rogers?

Highlights designed for aforementioned were meant to be just some friendly mocking, which sadly excluded explosions, sharp objects, mind games and sex jokes (especially with Tony, Pepper would have Loki’s hair for that, not to mention the nightmares after digging in the swamp of ex – playboy’s past experiences… just no). But there was also the charming exception of Steve whose reactions were so adorable and rewarding. It almost made Laufeyson squee, provided Darcy didn’t catch her boyfriend playing the poor Captain.

The remaining lists were on two opposite ends of the mischief scale.

On the first one there was a big red warning sign, Darcy’s pouting and a big, totally deserved scolding, not to mention a subtle title ‘War, Intergalactic Problems, Blood, Gore and Sad Kittens’. There were only two people, neither of which very responsive to his sense of humor so the temptation to mock either Odin or Nick Fury was never particularly strong. Usually.

The second list had to remain classified as it was the clearest proof in all the Nine Realms that he was getting soft.

It was called ‘Puppies, flowers, rainbows and not too long or you know very well what else’. The first place was always and forever reserved for Darcy, his exquisite and remarkable Midgardian who had enough spirit to handle his more sophisticated and less subtle ideas though it was just fair to put her above the Super Secret Boyband with Female Star from his most frequently chosen victims.

The close second was for Jane Foster, maybe not his favorite being but some sacrifices for both brotherly love and a chance of forming a normal relationship between the most likely sister – in – law and her husband’s not – really – but… well, you know the rest, had to be made.

Apparently Loki’s cold heart was vast enough and generous above any measure and maybe feeling teeny – weeny guilty when he put miraculously healed Phil Coulson on this list too.

And since time got by and circumstances kept changing (Doombots, X – men and other pesky creatures, fans, antifans, Wolverine, some Hydra survivors and did he mention Logan and the one speaking very odd mixture of English and French with an accent reminding Loki of Volstagg’s attempts on elf language?), Pepper Potts – Stark was temporarily (why even bother with kidding himself?) occupying a special position. It was safer that way, she could be dangerous on her own and omitting her in the weekly pranks’ festival was royally generous. Also it made Darcy happier (seriously? Why? Was there something she was keeping from him? Maybe there were pictures?) and Stark less nervous. That last thing was just the opposite to Loki’s chosen target, but well. Collateral damage.

Keeping track to all the lists, Loki began his preparation for the first Prankster Day of the month. He calmly accepted all the rules (“No long term effects, no explosions in the Tower, no touching anybody’s StarkPlayer, seriously, that could lead to war. No impersonating anybody especially in the Captain’s quarters… It means also no projecting Rogers in Stark’s bed with Romanoff covering herself with just the shield, Barton and his quiver and overgrown rubber duckies… Jeez, I’m giving you ideas, am I not?”) and started to plot.

After all, he did have a reputation to maintain.

 

* * *

 

 

Loki was in the middle of preparations, with a few successfully completed surprises for his cohabitants, when Pepper screamed.

On the ten – point scale from ‘kill that spider and get rid of the body’ to ‘Doombot alert, Avengers assemble and Tony leave that screwdriver this instant!’ it was impressive eleven. Something she would never achieve with a lie or a lovely joke to celebrate April Fool’s Day influencing her voice.

He would know. He was THE God of Mischief.

“Pepper? What has…” he went in the direction from where the sound came. Mrs. Potts – Stark was on the couch, the hem of the loose – fitting dress crumpled around her knees and a puddle of amniotic fluid forming on the carpet.

“It’s time. A week before schedule.” she gasped, panic tainting her usually calm gaze. “Please, get Tony. I’ll try to…”

“Don’t.” he asked firmly “I’ll bring him back this instant.” Loki immediately left for the laboratories to fetch the soon – to – be - father.

The God of Mischief didn’t think about leaving a double, mostly because he assumed that they will be back with Stark in less than a minute. Three minutes tops, in case Tony passed out, overwhelmed with joy and fear.

Little did Loki know about the power of Midgardian traditions.

 

* * *

 

“I don’t believe any word coming from your thin, supposedly silver mouth. Well, I don’t believe you on principle but if you thought I would believe you on April Fool’s Day you had to be truly optimistic.” Tony returned to work, doing his best to ignore the gatecrasher with very peculiar sense of humor.

“Stark, for the last time, Pepper’s water has just broke off, you can either move on your own accord or with the significant help of my magic and Thor’s hammer.”

“I thought Darcy had told you that April Fool’s Day was not about nasty jokes…”

“JARVIS!” Loki turned to his last resort.

“Sir, Ma’am is really in labor, I strongly suggest…”

“You electronic traitor. Loki, later you will tell me what have you done to my most attack proof creation, but for now…”

“Tony!’ Pepper shrieked, standing in the doorway and holding tightly her very pregnant belly “Move or I swear I will…”

“You weren’t kidding. On April Fool’s Day. Well, that’s the greatest of jokes.” Stark was getting fast to his mumbling stage.

“TONY!”

“Some help here, oh God of Mischief and Instant Teleportation?”

“Only for your divinely patient wife, mind you.”

 

* * *

 

 

Later, when they had few minutes with nothing more to do than just sit and wait for Pepper’s explicit request for some company during the birth, Stark decided to thank Loki.

“…but still it amazes me beyond reason that it wasn’t a joke.”

“Well, I suppose your offspring would most likely have the sense of humor to make the great entrance on such day. Like father like son.”

“And godfather. The offer is still up.”

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe that Darcy compared your idea to an old tradition in royal families. Though eight godfathers and three godmothers is an exaggeration of epic proportions.”

“Just disproportion, because only three females were close enough to our small, dysfunctional yet happy, superhero family.”

“True. Would you agree on mutual favor?”

Tony’s eyes went wider than ever.

“You? Darcy? Miniature Jotunn running around the Tower and changing porridge into icicles?”

Loki smiled radiantly.

“You insufferable twit! Fooling a man in my situation.” in contradiction to his words, Stark smiled back, equally widely “For the record, the deal is on. That misfortunate product of sass and subzero temperatures is going to need a level – headed role model representing the best qualities of terrestrial super heroism. And by the way? Darcy has already asked.”

God of Mischief felt both hot and cold in the same moment.


End file.
